voice + action ✪ there must be some way to bring the hero home

[herotypical]

[ after a week of agonizing combat, buffy summers returns home with only exhaustion on her mind. despite all the excitement and crisis, there's little left to do other than collapse onto her bed and fall into a sleep fit for a weary, worn-out soul. morning sees her feeling no less -- shudder -- zombieish. the horror of the last week is bone-and-marrow deep and has yet to fully make itself known in her system. the slayer is running on auxillery humanity, stringing herself along from second to second until she can find a friendly face. find willow and...

and all she finds is an empty room. an empty closet. empty drawers. her best friend is gone. deported while she wasn't even looking. come the afternoon, after she's gotten the first onslaught of emotions out of her system, buffy sits alone on the empty bed. she addresses her journal: ]

Willow and I have this game we like to play. Willow Rosenberg. She was in town...but now she's not. [ a pause allows buffy to catch her breath. to stay strong. ] We call it 'Anywhere But Here' -- self-explanatory, really. Pick a fantasty-elsewhere to be and a fantasy-someone to share it with. I'm not talking about the obvious ones: home or family or anything even remotely whiffing of responsibility. I'm talking about fun. I'm talking about pure escapism. I'm talking Daniel Craig on the beach or Amy Yip at the waterpark.

I'll go first. Show you how it's done. [ but which escape route from reality should she take? ] The '88 Winter Olympics. The Saddledome. Calgary, of all places. Brian Boitano is taking the time to personally skate me through his gold medal routine. Perhaps there's hot chocolate involved. I, being made entirely of my own imagination, copy each move perfectly.

Got it? Good. Because now it's your turn.

[ when her broken little tribute to an absent friend is finished, she'll be searching out her injured pirate (wherever he may be convalescing) and it's off to good spirits, where she can be found working a shift behind the bar. ]

Comments

[herotypical]

[ there's something familiar... ]

Magical how? 'Cause I hear you gotta be careful with ensorceled sweets.

[eightgoingonthirty]

En-sore-sel ... umm, Rorona doesn't know big words. But but, it's magic 'cos it never runs out, and you don't get sick from eating it, and it's really good too!

[herotypical]

...What about cavities, huh?

[eightgoingonthirty]

... What's a "cavities"?

[herotypical]

They're...[ cavities. ] Holes, I guess. In your teeth. Hence the need for brushing and flossing.

[eightgoingonthirty]

Holes? You can get holes in your teeth?! [Oh gosh that sounds completely terrible.] Rorona doesn't want cavities! The moon isn't candy anymore!

[herotypical]

It's fine. I think. As long as you go to a dentist. I mean...

[ wait. is she trying to talk the girl back into believing that the moon should be candy? ]

[eightgoingonthirty]

A dentist? Can a dentist save Rorona from having hole-y teeth? [ ...!! ] So, Rorona can eat all the magic moon candy she wants?

[herotypical]

Maybe. Possibly. Do you even have a toothbrush?

[eightgoingonthirty]

Umm ... no ... But, a store would have toothbrushes, right? Rorona just needs to buy one at the store and everything will be okay!

[herotypical]

Should do. But...[ is it already new feather season that this girl doesn't know... ] You won't have to pay. There's no actual buying.

[eightgoingonthirty]

Really? You don't need to? But Rorona thought--

[She pauses suddenly, then lets out a thoughtful "hmm". That's right ... things in this place were free for some reason.]

... Ohhhh, yeah. Rorona forgot. My head got funny, so Rorona must've forgot a lot of things. Sooorry!

[herotypical]

[ her...head got funny? ]

Is, uhm, everything okay? Rorona? You sound a little...

[ young? ]

[eightgoingonthirty]

Um, lots of things are really fuzzy in my head, so maybe not. Maybe it's an ... ex-pery-mint? [ ... ] Rorona doesn't know what that is though.

[herotypical]

Right now? [ already? ] I...

I don't think there's one. Not at the moment. But I just...

How long've you been here?

[eightgoingonthirty]

How long? Um ... Rorona woke up here yesterday, but she's been here four months now.

[herotypical]

And did this waking up happen to take place after a longish kinda absence?

[eightgoingonthirty]

Yeah! Yeah, it was one week, and now it's another! Something scary came after me, and ... and then maybe something else happened? But I woke up here again, so I guess Rorona won't get bothered anymore.

[herotypical]

Oh, hun. You were kidnapped.

[eightgoingonthirty]

Kidnapped? Why would anyone kidnap me?! That's so mean! I didn't do anything bad! Rorona's innocent!

[herotypical]

I'm sure you didn't. It's their fault; not yours.

[eightgoingonthirty]

... Then they're just really bad people who hurt others for no reason? [ ... ] Are they gonna come after Rorona again?

[herotypical]

Not...not right away.

[ she can't promise more than that, to be honest. ]

[eightgoingonthirty]

Hmmmm ... Well, then I'm gonna make sure they don't get Rorona again. Umm, somehow. Maybe I'll practice at hide-and-go-seek ...

[herotypical]

It's a shame that the good old groin-shot doesn't work on metal men.