ooc ↻ appointments & messages

[herotypical]

❮ buffy, when i said you could slay vampires and have a social life, i didn't mean at the same time! ❯

catch-all appointments & messages post for herotypical @ luceti; please title and date your top tag accordingly -- think of the childrentimelines! [ written ], [ voice ] & [ action ] are all viable. the addition of funky and hip song lyrics is also welcome (and maybe a little encouraged).

ATTENTION -- looking for old threads? previous appointment posts can be found here and here.

Comments

[originaljackass]

Jack frowned. "I'm not a daddy-figure. I'm her... big buddy. Her cool uncle."

[herotypical]

"...Cool uncle."

[originaljackass]

"Awesome uncle," he clarified.

[herotypical]

"In TV-land, the awesome uncles always turn out to be deadbeats with no direction, no job, and no dignity."

[originaljackass]

"Clearly you never watched Full House."

Jack saw an episode of it once. Uncle Jesse was awesome.

[herotypical]

"I could never get over the fact that Michelle was played by twins. Does that not creep you out?"

[originaljackass]

[herotypical]

"I'm serious! It got too distracting trying to figure out which one she was on any given episode.

My point still stands, though. You're being kind of an asshole."

[originaljackass]

"Of course! I'm the bad guy!"

Jack threw his hands up in the air and rolled his eyes.

[herotypical]

"At least suggest he move in next door. Nearby. Make some kind of effort. Do you really wanna be the guy who starts sounding like he's running a one-kid cult?"

Seriously. Cutting people off from their loved ones? Red flag number one.

[originaljackass]

"I did that. I told him there was plenty of places to crash there. What do you take me for?" Jack pretended to be insulted.

[herotypical]

"...Apparently, I take you for the kind of guy who cares whether he gets to look after a kid or not." A beat. "Which was supposed to sound like an insult, but it didn't really come out that way. Did it?"

[originaljackass]

It may have sounded like a compliment, but it left Jack feeling vaguely conflicted over why he wanted to keep Clementine so much. This only made him annoyed. "Well kids are a rare commodity in Luceti. At least the little ones."

And then he realized that defense of his own indifference to the world only made him sound creepy. Dammit. "... and she's really interesting in conversations. Really."

[herotypical]

"Yeah -- sure. I like the gal, too. But--"

Maybe this was pointless. Jack did as Jack did, and she had very little right to interfere. She meddled only when his meddling meddled with her matters. "It's really-truly-entirely her choice? You didn't bribe her or anything, did you?"

[originaljackass]

"No!" Jack glared at her. Then he had a thought. "Do you think that would work though?"

[herotypical]

"Dunno. Never worked on me..."

Then again, she suspected that Hank Summers hadn't truly tried all that much. A pair of shoes here, an ice show there.

[originaljackass]

"Well she really likes the blue pig. He doesn't have one of those."

Of course, he'd never given the blue pig to Cleementine. But that was leverage.

[herotypical]

"Promise her a pony while you're at it."

You're crooked, Jack Horner. And she won't ever see you as anything but. And yet, will still willingly enjoy your company, laugh at your jokes, and keep you semi-gainfully employed. Buffy was an odd duck.

"He really chewed you out over the language thing, huh?" Good on him.

[originaljackass]

Jack barely paid attention to the second statement because Jack remembered there really were ponies in Luceti. Talking ponies. He considered the possibility that he could at least introduce Clementine to one. But first, he was going to need to become best friends with a pony. It was a task that gave him absolutely no pleasure, but it might just be worth it.

"Ponies," he repeated thoughtfully. Then he looked at her. "Language?"

[herotypical]

"You said he got mad 'cause she picked up some language. Probably of the blue variety, I'm guessing?"

[originaljackass]

"She thinks fucking is adult hugging." He hasn't found a way to fix that yet.

1/3

[herotypical]

2/3

[herotypical]

Oh, gosh. Don't laugh don't laugh please don't laugh. Buffy stuck a thumbnail between her teeth and glanced away, suppressing a smile. Trying to summon forth her righteous indignation.

3/3

[herotypical]

"...She didn't come to this conclusion all on her own, did she?"

[originaljackass]

"She... may have been given some help in reaching that conclusion. Purely by accident. But it could be worse. Kids learn worse than that on TV every day!"